💨Shift happens.

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In this edition of Notes from the Sea Suite:

💨 A tiny shift can have big implications

🙋‍♀️ Some questions to guide you to choose your own perspective

🌟 A special offer for the women in tech out there

SHIFT HAPPENS

In two days, we would set sail from Reunion Island with our sights set on Africa. As with any major passage, there was a lot to do and I was busy making sure that we were chugging through that list. The pre-passage tasks (provisioning, cooking, fill up with water, fuel, etc.) had become committed to muscle memory over the last year, so I had plenty of room for other thoughts to join me as we prepared.

The thought on repeat this time was: ‘This is going to be really tough.’ And that thought came with a deep, dark pit in my stomach.

The passage to Richards Bay, South Africa would be about 1300 nautical miles, but considering some of the distances we’ve already traveled on Pure Joy, that was the least of my concerns. More on my mind this time were the complex currents, tall waves, confused seas and a treacherous final approach to land that this stretch of ocean is known for.

We’d had a rough passage across the last stretch of ocean, and my mental strategy leading up to that one had been to unconvincingly repeat to myself: ‘It will be fine. It will be FINE.’ And to be fair, it was fine. But, I’d felt caught out and scared in the process. White-knuckling it got me through it, but I knew I wanted to take a different approach this time.

That being said, simply acknowledging that this one would in fact be hard and uncomfortable didn’t feel great either. ‘This is going to be really tough,’ was not the vibe I wanted to be carrying across the last bit of the Bucking Indian Ocean. But I couldn’t quite put my finger on what was.

And then, my new perspective found me. A post from some sailing friends (Sailing Yacht June) came through my Instagram feed. They’d just crossed from Fiji to New Zealand - also a notoriously rough passage - and this is what they’d had to say about it:

“It was everything a passage should be: challenging, exhilarating, humbling and unforgettable. We’re so grateful for a safe arrival and excited for this new chapter ahead.” - @sailing_june

The hairs on the back of my neck stood up. I screenshotted it and put it into my notes app. I showed it to David and told him THIS was the mentality that I was taking into the next passage. We agreed - it’s SUPPOSED to be challenging and exhilarating. We can look FORWARD to humbling and unforgettable. And so we would. The shift I’d felt was palpable and an exciting relief.

The night before we set sail, I was enjoying a final sunset on Reunion Island with some of the other women in the fleet, and we were talking about the tough passage that lay ahead of us. I told them about June and read the lines aloud. One of my friends, who also knows June, started laughing out loud. I asked why and she showed me her phone - with the exact same lines screenshotted from the Instagram post. We laughed at how it clearly resonated with us both, and the rest of the women agreed that this would be the winning perspective to carry us across this next passage.

As it turned out, Pure Joy had a relatively easy crossing to South Africa. We had some fabulous days of sailing, and on the days of no wind, we were able to step on the gas to get ahead of an incoming weather front. A few bumps along the way, but nothing to write home about.

Not all of our friends were so fortunate. The weather caught up with those further back in the fleet and some of them faced some pretty harrowing conditions.

I spoke to my friend Jane about it afterwards. She’d been one of the women watching that sunset on Reunion with me.

She told me, ‘The seas were calm, and then they weren’t. 40 knot winds, 4 meter waves. I could see waves reaching half-way up the mast when we were at a certain angle. That’s when the penny dropped - that we had sailed into a massive storm, with our three children. I felt mildly panicked…and then your voice came into my head.’

I laughed out loud. ‘Really?! What did it say?!’

Jane replied, ‘Exhilarating. It said exhilarating. And it felt much less scary.’

Jane went on to tell me that while they were in the storm, she was messaging with our friend Allison on a very small boat that was further behind. That boat was also going into incredibly rough seas and Jane could tell from the WhatsApp exchange that our friend was also scared.

As if to pass the baton of a new perspective back again, Jane told her, ‘These are going to be our greatest stories to be told over glasses of wine for many years.’

‘Unforgettable,’ I said.

‘100% unforgettable,’ Jane agreed.

Gratefully, Jane, Allison and all of the other sailors in our fleet made it safely to Richard’s Bay. And I am so proud of us all.

More often than we’d like to admit, our perspective is the only thing we truly have control over. But the good news is, unlike the wind, a tiny little shift in that perspective can change everything.

It’s a radical, bold choice to choose your own perspective. I’d go so far as to say that to choose a new perspective that can empower you rather than drain you - that is the real work of self-leadership.

And when you lead yourself well, others follow, whether that is your intention or not.


CURIOSITY PROMPTS

Next time you are filled with heavy feelings for a situation, consider the following questions:

  1. What are you feeling? Get specific. Use an emotions wheel to help if you like. Think about the physical sensations the emotion brings with it. If it had a colour, what would it be? A shape?

  2. If those emotions had a voice, and if that voice was telling you something about this situation, what would it be saying? That’s the thought at the root of your discomfort.

  3. What are those thoughts and feelings costing you? Note: These thoughts/feelings aren’t ‘bad’ and you are not ‘bad’ for having them. In fact, anyone in your shoes would have them! They just aren’t serving you any more.

  4. What’s another perspective that you could take on the situation? (Careful here - when we attempt to do a complete 180 on how we feel about something in one go, it rarely works. This belief needs to be…believable. And only a bit more empowering than your current thought in order to move you forward.) If you are searching for a new perspective and one doesn’t immediately come up for you, just note that you are open to a new perspective. You might be surprised where you find it.

  5. What’s one small action you want to take to integrate this new thought into your belief system? You can write it down daily, put it on a post-it note, make it your phone home screen - you do you. But I’ve found that trying it on for size verbally, sharing it with others works the best for me. AND, it could have the added bonus of inspiring someone else to remember that they too get to choose their perspective and find their power.

BONUS CONTENT

Speaking of strong self-leadership, if you only do one thing to set yourself up for a brilliant 2026, make sure it is to reflect back meaningfully on 2025. Consider my Wins & Lessons Audit your guide for doing just that. You’ll find it to be way more than an opportunity to pat yourself on the back - with the way I structure it, you’ll also be building confidence and clarity for what’s ahead. And it’s free, so it should be a no-brainer! Just hit reply to this email to say hi and I’ll send it to you!

WRITE YOUR NEXT CHAPTER

If you are a woman in tech, make sure you don’t miss out on all that Women@Tech have to offer. In addition to the events and community they offer to members for FREE, they are sponsoring a discount on my course, Progress with Purpose. Check it out!

In all curiousness,

Joy

P.S. If/when the spirit ever moves you or you have questions - always feel free to get in touch and let me know what’s coming up for you!

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