Ride the wave.
In this edition of Notes from the Sea Suite:
💪 What I’m learning about hard seasons out here in the middle of the Indian Ocean
🙋♀️ Some questions you’ll want to ask yourself the next time YOUR compass spins
🌟 An opportunity to work with me to create your Next Chapter Breakthrough - for FREE 😮
We’re in the middle of the Indian Ocean. Everyone said that this would be the toughest sea we’d cross. And as it turns out, they were not lying. The waves are huge and they are relentless. The weather is wet and grey, meaning very little sunlight during the day and very little moonlight at night and everything feels just a little bit damp. And the winds always seem to be teetering on the edge of dangerous or wanting to push us in the wrong direction… or both.
As you might know by now, I’m not out here on this journey around the world just because it’s a cool thing to accomplish. I’m here because this adventure aligns with so many of my core values and because I’ve got a deep sense that the experiences I’m having out here are carrying the exact lessons I’m going to need in future chapters of life and work.
I’ve come to think that maybe what' the ‘Bucking Indian Ocean’ (aptly named by a friend on another boat out here), is trying to teach me is about the harder seasons we all go through in our lives and careers. Just in case I’m right about that, I’m taking stock of what is working and what isn’t in THIS hard season I find myself in.
What’s giving me energy to keep going…
Focusing on the NOW. I can acknowledge my circumstances and my feelings about them right now without layering on worry about the rest of this passage or future passages. This is especially useful when things are particularly intense. And it’s especially effective if I can manage to ALLOW myself to have the feelings, observe them up close, without (and this is key!) judging them or trying to fix them.
Normalizing. I created a WhatsApp group at the start of this expedition for mums in the fleet. (There are 6 other boats with kids aboard in our Rally.) The majority of the chat is about plans and logistics, but in times like these, it’s heavy on venting. And it’s ALWAYS a relief to hear that others are feeling exactly as I am, and to hear the same relief from someone else when I vent as well.
Daydreaming. If I am going to think about the future, I let my mind wander to how good it’s going to feel to come out of this season. And I let myself actually FEEL that relief, sense of accomplishment, joy and fun - if only for a moment. I could also call this mental rehearsal or visualisation. Whatever it’s called, I imagine the best possible outcome in lots of detail, and let myself feel good about it!
Noticing and creating small delights. We are planning a half-way pizza party. We saw dolphins yesterday. I’m listening to my favourite songs from ‘Life of a Showgirl’ on repeat. I pause and let these little sparks of joy have their moment.
Embracing the ‘hard’. I’ve taken to imagining that I’m on a mechanical bull while the waves are throwing me around the boat. I occasionally even let out a ‘yee-haw’! As I learned in previous challenges, the ‘hard’ is pretty sustainable if I’m not afraid of it or angry about it.
What’s not…
Toxic Positivity. I’ve figured out that I can notice a delight without lying to myself about the challenge I’m in the middle of. It’s an AND. Both can exist. The delight doesn’t have to be a band-aid for the challenge. It can be it’s very own thing.
Excessive worrying. This brings me back to focusing on the NOW. I’ve got a finite amount of energy, and there are some pretty important things to spend it on. I truly cannot afford to waste it on things that might never happen.
I wrote this post-it to myself so long ago that I really don’t remember what sparked this thought. It’s been smooshed at the bottom of my pencil case for at least 2 years. As I started to write today, I felt a pull to dig it out. I’m choosing to believe this today, and I’m sharing it with you just in case it feels supportive to you too. 👉👉👉
It really can seem like we’ve got no choice in the matter when we are getting thrown around by our circumstances. Whether those circumstances be a wild ocean, a shocking development at work or anything in between. But we can choose. Not about whether or not the waves happening, but about whether we’ll resist them with fear, anger or apathy, or if we’ll ride them out the best way we know how.
CURIOSITY PROMPTS
If you are going through a hard season - professionally or personally - at the moment…
What might be holding you back from staying present? What’s that belief costing you?
Who can you vent to? Let them know you aren’t yet in solution mode if that’s where you are at.
What’s the best possible outcome of this situation? What will it feel like when you get to the other side?
What could embracing the hard of this situation look like for you?
BONUS CONTENT
File it under ‘Better Late than Never’… I’m finally on Instagram! Come join me @joypooleleadership for all of the following:
✨ Bite-sized leadership insights
✨ Behind-the-scenes of life aboard Pure Joy
✨ Tools and inspiration to help high-performing women lead themselves and others with clarity, courage, and purpose
WRITE YOUR NEXT CHAPTER
Feeling stuck or craving more clarity for what’s next? Let’s create your BREAKTHROUGH.
I’m testing a new personalised coaching experience designed to support you to get unstuck and clear on what’s next — through a custom video I’ll create just for you. Here’s how it works:
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Interested? Simply send me an email (joy@poolegroup.co.uk) and let me know!
In all curiousness,
Joy
P.S. If/when the spirit ever moves you or you have questions - always feel free to get in touch and let me know what’s coming up for you!
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